Gathering Roses

I'm having one of those nights where I sit and think about everything that is depressing about my life and my choices. I'm a sad, bitter, angry, lonely person, and I can only blame myself. It is one of those nights when I feel as though I am not capable of feeling love. I feel.. broken.. hollow. Yes I have a daughter, and I feel for her what every parent feels for their off spring.. the love I'm talking about refers is the one that a person should feel in other relationships.. I'm so messed up.. Have I ever loved anyone? I don't know.. I've thought it was love.. but I don't know. Am I broken? Is there some part of me that is just not? I lived with a guy for 5 years.. and he gave me my daughter.. did I love him? I honestly don't know.. I said I did.. I thought I did.. but I don't think we were together long enough to know if it was love or not.. I just.. Every relationship I have been in.. I feel I was pushed to say "I love you." I felt pressured to say it, to "feel" it.. now I look back and I ask myself.. did I really love them? So yeah.. not a good night in this brain..